Alright, listen up, people. Our fugitive has been on the run for ninety minutes. Average foot speed over uneven ground barring injuries is 4 miles-per-hour. That gives us a radius of six miles. What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in that area. Checkpoints go up at fifteen miles. Your fugitive’s name is Dr Richard Kimble. Go get him.
In the last five days I have been asked three times if I am the 98FM Fugitive, part of a promotion by a local radio station. I’m considering asking the station for a job since everyone seems to think I’m so suited to it. On the other hand the evidence does seem to suggest that I’m a little too easy to find so maybe hiring me would be a money-loser for them.
Perhaps I could just carry around a little envelope that I could give to people to trick them into believing that they had won. Inside would be a note: "Sucker! I’m not the fugitive. lolz0rs zomg!"